Making Decisions

13 Aug

I often find myself at the crossroads when there is a decision to be made that will have an impact on others. Simply because I really despise messing up or better yet, messing over someone’s feelings. It’s a lot to take into account at times, following your hearts desires while keeping in mind the desires of others, which consistently leaves me in a state of paralysis of analysis.
I’ve come in contact with many who don’t seem to be affected by this problem, been on the receiving end of their “by any means necessary.” Rarely did it feel good, and while I logically grasp and even advocate, the importance of being true to oneself, I wonder where the line is to drawn when another person’s emotions are at play; is there even a line to be drawn?
Now in my analysis I sometimes wonder if my response or lack thereof in these scenarios can be solely attributed to my feminine wiring. In my interactions with males, it appears as though pulling the trigger on the opposition is not a task that is met with much difficulty. They sometimes even come across as heartless in the pursuit.
Recently, I had to make a choice between fulfilling a familial “obligation” or spending time with a friend. I felt the pressure when trying to decide what “the right thing to do” was. Was it right to do what was expected of me (basically because I always do) or be true to myself (which I believe would have the bigger long-term payoff). The first option had the potential of disappointing someone else while the second would cause me some momentary dissatisfaction.
This issue plagues me and the stress-filled emotional rollercoaster that making these decisions takes me on is definitely something I’d like to avoid.

I don’t have a sure-fire way to ensure that everyone is satisfied, but what I am coming to grips with, is that the only one who can make sure that I am satisfied is me, I cannot live with regrets, so in my analysis, I now ask, “Which decision will I regret later?” So far that is a good start…

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